Wellllll wellllll wellllll! I am beaming as I type this!!!
It hit me this week that things had changed around here. Things were going smoothly. We were surviving and thriving all at the same time. The arguments weren't dominating our days. The minutes weren't seeming like years. I would have energy at the end of a day!
I began to reflect on the source of the change:
Right off the bat, we haven't been sleep deprived in about two months now (unless we do it of our own volition on family game night- whoops!) Thanks baby Jack.
But really, a few months ago I started praying for joy, a deeper well spring of joy to overflow in my heart. It's a fruit of the Spirit, and I was desperate to have more. I am generally a pretty happy joyful person. Perhaps no one noticed but me? However, I had determined that mothering had started taking its toll on me in little ways. Just things that used to light me up, weren't. My kids smiles didn't provoke my own. Their discoveries weren't exciting to me. I wasn't laughing as much. The days were really feeling long. I went to the Lord. I would say, "Lord! I know the verse '...the joy of the Lord is my strength' (Nehemiah 8:10) I want to be strong because I have your joy empowering me!"
God is not a genie, it was not overnight, but He did fulfill His promises in scripture to empower me with His joy. He is faithful.
Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. James 1:2-3
Hey kiddos,
There is some seriously awesome fruit coming from you guys in this season. It feels so good to see all the positive, healthy, behavior coming from you because of the hard work we put in.
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| Keeping your hands on the car in a parking lot |
Much like an actual garden, which needs tender everyday care to produce its fruit, so you all have been our little plants. Daddy and I both, day after day tend to you all, asking for wisdom and direction for you. We prune, we encourage and water, we protect from the storms and pests...and then we pray to the Lord of the harvest that you all would produce righteousness.
The three of you are little mirrors of us these days. We see the way you talk to one another, the way you sin and then forgive, your tenderness (for the most part) toward one another, your "team unity" in caring for each other. We frequently quote this around our house:
"Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you." Ephesians 4:32
You know that verse. We are teaching it to you, and it fills us with joy to see it manifesting in your lives.
I'm admitting in this that seeing so many good interactions this week, so many prompt obedience moments, overhearing you all speak to one another in love (not always, but so many great attempts!) has been such a deep source of joy for me. It is encouraging me that we have heard the Lord correctly, and that our obedience is bringing this forth.
I know we aren't perfect. I'm not claiming to be. IT'S GRACE.
You see, the fruit hasn't just come from you, it's coming from all of us.
Yes, the Lord has done a work in your Daddy's heart, and in my heart as well. And this is RIGHT! We should always be growing, changing, and being malleable to the Lord as He shapes us. This is the very freedom that we have in Christ! Our fruit! We have deeper satisfaction as parents, deeper obedience springing forth, deeper holiness in our desires to please the Lord. Our hearts have been endeared to a tenderness. We see that Scripture upholds these character attributes and we hope to continue to mature in them. Help us, Jesus! And of course, we have so much more JOY! Our trials are producing perseverance, and that has made us glad! Thank you Lord!
Kids, the Lord is good to encourage His children through each other. It's evident in Scripture and it happens all the time today. "Experiencing God" is a great book that I read years ago with this very premise. When other believers feel similarly, it is a beautiful display of God's affirmation through one another. So! A few nights ago, we were directed to this video, which we rejoiced over. It highlighted sooooo many of the things that the Lord had already laid on our hearts before we EVER SAW IT. Amen! Praise God!!!!
While we agreed with so much of the parenting issues (reaching your hearts, streamlining our home) the part that blessed us the most was the admission that in the season we are at with you guys (all littles that are very young and close in age), we should be expected to be unable to turn any attention outward to others. Daddy and I are focused so much on you all right now, and that is what is right, and proper. It was a blessing to see another couple affirming that. We have often felt isolated or misunderstood. But nevertheless, it isn't up to us to please anyone but the Lord. So that is what we are doing. Being obedient, and pleasing Him.
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| Morning "Snuggies" |
Finally, I want to say this:
At the same time I share all this goodness that has come forth with diligent parenting, I also have experienced a caution from the Lord. I was confronted with the reality, lest I begin to think I can control everything about the way you all will "turn out", that I cannot expect to craft an environment that will be fail safe. I could elaborate, but I won't. I'm still sitting with the Lord on this one, and I'm sure I will have more to say about it later. So much of life is a balance. Moderation surfaces in our language as it revolves around the Word and around our choices...I believe this will be no different.
I'm just encouraged, little ones, and I want to make sure we mark it in our "family journal" to look back at in the times when we may be weary in well doing...
I love you,
Mommy
