Baby number four...with you has come our conclusion that starting one big family blog is the way to go. I'll include links to the twin's blog and to Vivien's, but you are ushering in a new era: The era of Efficiency.
I was hoping that we would conceive another baby. Jonathan and I both were. We hope to have more. And from what I understand about families with many kids is that the sooner you adopt a "big family mentality" the better. The Lord knew what He was doing with us.
Jonathan and I took a walk with the kiddos recently and laughed (until there were tears!) about God's perfect will in changing us through our family. When we got married, the biggest reason we knew that we were picking the right person for our lives was because of our willing hearts to be whomever, do whatever, and go wherever the Lord willed. We wanted to be malleable. This quality that we recognize and admire in one another is a foundation for our marriage. Our love and devotion towards Christ. Kids are part of the "whomever" part right now. We are changing so much by serving our family. We're thankful, and we both want to change more. MORE Lord. More of you and your character, more of your Spirit, and less, LESS of us.
Efficiency. So, with a big family mentality came the urgency to become efficient. I have some strengths in this area. So does Jonathan. We can see how a lot of those play into a big family mentality. For instance, Jonathan is very good at the vision. The long term goal. He can see it, and he can implement the strategic plans to make it happen. Financially I feel very secure knowing that we have a plan. Do we iron out the kinks? Of course. Do things change? Sure. But, we have a long term vision. We are efficiently working towards it!
But efficiency is serving a more practical role currently. Namely, efficiency in our home. Yes, we would all be mad as hatters around here if we didn't have the proper home efficiency. This monster is constantly being tweaked, and as I led with, it is what we are tackling now. With number four on the way (Yes, you, sweet boy or girl!), I have aided Daddy with a plan of attack (on paper, the way he likes it *wink*) and I am taking big strides to meet the milestones over the next few months. I am surprised at how quickly this pregnancy is flying. I am halfway through already!
With that halfway mark comes the familiar feelings of the second trimester. Oh! THIS is the time when I can really accomplish a lot! I am not so big that it gets tiring, yet not feeling icky and needing a nap. It's a lovely semester, and I am trying to take advantage of it! Last week I childproofed our kitchen cabinets, and tackled some bigger organization projects. This week, I finished a painting project downstairs and I am halfway done with the girl's room upstairs. Whatever it takes to create a safe environment for four children under the age of three, that is the goal.
In the meantime, I am enjoying being a mom.
Yes, I said it. I am enjoying lazy mornings with my babies. I am enjoying staying in my pajamas way too late (Vivien always reminds me that I need to change clothes and put on my make up while I try to get her to calm down that type A mentality and just snuggle with me for a minute!)
We are trying to reconcile our night owl proclivities with our crack of dawn (or before!) children. Sigh. Don't they understand that sleeping in is the 11th commandment ;)
There is so much I am learning right now. I have never felt more alienated as far as my beliefs, and at the same time never more comfortable and happy. All around me I see confusion, stress, brokenness, fear, and shame. I am thankful that we are not, and that I am not, in that place. I am thankful that Jesus came to stand in my place, to save me from that, and to heal me here through His Word and through His Spirit. It is powerful.
Number four, I feel you making little laps in my belly (I do wonder if the twins left you enough room in there to actually DO laps!) and I am excited to meet you. I'm excited to see your face and to hold you. I'm excited to have you be apart of our family. I'm thankful that the Lord has entrusted us with you, and I want to honor that.
"Teach me your way, LORD, that I may rely on your faithfulness; give me an undivided heart, that I may fear your name." Psalm 86:11
We love you Number Four. Can't wait to meet you little bug of ours!
Love, Mommy
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